Thursday, 18 October 2012

How do you sleep at night?

The eminent Robert Phipps, a body language 'expert' has been commissioned to produce some research on peoples' sleeping positions.


Lets hear what Robert has to say for himself first:

Robert's services have been called upon by some of the world's largest corporations, his media appearances number well over 100 TV shows and hundreds if not thousands of comments for newspapers, magazines and radio stations.
Due to popularity most of these courses get booked quite early, especially as they are often restricted to just 25 delegates per course.

Back to the research... From The Telegraph:

The results, he claims, can identify how stressful your day was, how much you worry and how much control you have over your life.

It is said to reveal traits such as stubbornness, bossiness and fanciful dreaming, as well as how self-critical a person is or whether they feel in control of life.  

Of course. Naturally. How could it not?

According to his research, more than half of British adults sleep in the “foetal” position, curled up on their side with knees tucked in. This stance, favoured by worriers, is said to show the sleeper is seeking to return to their comfort zone after a stressful day. 

Utter bollocks.

The log position, with a straight body and limbs at the sides, shows a person is inflexible and rigid in thinking, set in their ways and stubborn.  

More bollocks

A quarter of people taking part in the study classed themselves as “yearners”, sleeping with their arms stretched out in front as though they are chasing their dreams or being chased. 

He got paid to produce this?

A further 17 per cent of respondents classed themselves as “freefallers”, sleeping face down with their arms outstretched.
Often clutching their pillow, they can appearing to be “holding on for dear life” in what is thought to be the most uncomfortable sleeping position for adults. 

Enough! Who commissioned this piece of self-promoting bollocks?

The research, for budget hotel chain Premier Inn, revealed the “log” as the second most popular position, adopted by nearly three in every ten people.  

Ah - thought so - an advert.